I have been getting high too regularly.
It was a nice break from the intensity of sobriety + kundalini
Now the break is over. I would like some clarity for a while. Also, since I won’t be able to smoke in Spain, I don’t want to have that week of holiday to be the first week without it. I’d like to adjust back to no weed for a bit beforehand.
I’m looking forward to reading again. I’m looking forward to Sadhana. To TWIM. To journalling. To discipline and structure. A little is healing. Too much is not. Time just keeps going by and your mind is in a sort of hazy state. My awareness feels dampened. I feel less competent. Less sharp.
Twim & sobriety.
yes. I really really want freedom. I am in a sleep state. Consciousness so dull. Need to surrender and do a bunch of difficult stuff. Need to get back outside of this. The bodymind is on autopilot. I want autonomy again.