10:27
I had the swelling in my side and general discomfort last night. I woke up in the night and checked my watch, it was 3:39am. I had trippy thoughts at this time. I woke again by my guitar falling over at 7am. After the guitar fell I was lying in bed with introspective thoughts again and had a bunch of insights into how/why I have fallen in frequency again. It was caused by attachments. I have started clinging to things and not living in alignment with the truth – the truth including the fact of impermanence, which makes all clinging and attachments futile. I had also started identifying with the thoughts too. I then did a surrender type meditation with body scanning and it felt really good. It’s like I could see the ‘cords’ that had become attached to me, by my own will, which were draining my energy, I could see them fall away from me. I became the space around my body. I became the infinite nothingness. I became spirit. I had the astral projection feelings. A feeling of rising, of vibrations increasing. With it came this feeling of abundance which was increasing… Becoming attached to form, to the impermanent, and living as if any form can be permanent, this leads you to become increasingly more drained. More depleted. It makes you broke spiritually. Living in alignment with the truths of death and impermanence and no-self cause one to be connected to the source of all life which keeps that vitalizing current flowing through you.
I feel more fresh. I really want to stay here always… Always fully in the world but never of the world.